Some of us that are in the waiting phase of the adoption process can be in a little different place than others.
Currently my wife and I are waiting to adopt our second child – a baby from somewhere in the States. Of course, we don’t know exactly from where or when we will match with a birthmother.
What makes this different is that we already have a little one that we adopted back in 2007. She keeps us very busy and somewhat distracted from dwelling on the wait.
No, the waiting isn’t any better or worse…just different. We started our process two years ago (see our story here). We have been married for 17 years and have always talked about having several children.
After dealing with infertility for several years, we knew that adoption was how God planned for us to have a family, so that’s where our journey began.
The waiting period is difficult no matter who you are. The first time around for us it seemed like we were agonizing over the days, weeks, and months that we had to wait. We tried to keep busy and distracted.
While we found things to do, it never seemed like enough. As it turned out, we waited about 9 months from when our profile and paperwork were completed to when we brought our precious little baby girl home.
Some adoptive families have waited far longer than this and would love to only have waited that long. Other families have been blessed to have a placement within a few weeks.
It would be great if all of us could have it happen that fast, but reality is a domestic infant adoption generally takes longer. The other reality is that God has a plan for each of us – the right birthmother, the right baby for us.
The time we are going through now is tough too.
We have been waiting again for 8 months. As each day and week pass, we get more anxious and a little frustrated. Just as with the first time, you start second guessing yourself.
- Is our profile good enough?
- Have we done enough to let everyone know we want to adopt again?
- Are we waiting longer because we already have a child?
- Did we say the right things in our birthmother letter or in our video?
What we have to keep reminding ourselves is this…God’s perfect timing will happen once again, just as with our first adoption journey.
As we reflect back on that time it is obvious to us that she was meant to be our daughter. She is our sunshine. We will adopt again and bring home another baby that will be the one God meant for us.
If you are in the waiting phase – or wherever you are in your own adoption journey, let me encourage you to keep going. You will bring your baby home.
UPDATE: We adopted our son in 2012! Here’s the story.